Yesterday night i volunteered at the pregnancy center, and we had a busy night. Today i went to the fancy expensive mall in order to return said Christmas gifts from my dh. So probably that was not the best combination for anybody's mental state.
It was just me (still a trainee, remember) and an older lady working there last night. But we had more people that night than have come in, total, all the time i have worked there. It was like 6-7 in that one-and-a-half hour period. That does not sound like alot, but it is. We like to spend some time with the clients, not just give them what they want and shove them out the door. Mostly it was routine requests for baby clothes, maternity wear, etc. We spent alot of time trying to find the right paper to give a voucher to one mother, for free furniture from St. Vincent de Paul. I hope she was able to get it.
Then it was nearly the end of the evening and a lady came in with mother and husband in tow, to pick up a portacrib and stroller. Her baby boy is due in 3 weeks, and she had everything ready, but they had a fire on monday and lost everything. I had to look up her file, and though i did not read in detail i did notice she was one of the ones who was referred to us by the fellow who prays outside abortion clinics.
I don't know how i feel about that whole thing. They say he is very kind and humble, and does not yell at the women or anything, but tries to intervene if they can and tell them that there are organizations (like ours) that can give them what they need, if they choose to have the baby. But still in my mind it is a little too much. Nevertheless, this woman was sent by him, and she has 5 other children, ranging in ages from 16 to 8. Obviously she thought she was done done done, and this new pg threw her for a real loop. I know that feeling, it really threw me for a loop when i found out i was pg with Nicolas, 10 years after having A. Hence the panic, the run to the abortion clinic, the last-minute change of mind. I can relate to some extent.
And then, what? The intervention, the decision made to keep the child, the preparations. She got everything she needed for herself -- this woman has a job and a dh at home. And then, three weeks before the baby is due, the house burns down. Heck, it is not anything near having your baby die. But it is a loss nevertheless, and i felt very bad for her. You feel like, if you made the 'right' decision, God should reward you, not take more. But then again, i chose the 'right' way too -- i chose to have my babies, even though they were unplanned. And i think that in our culture, most people who are faced with an unplanned pregnancy will consider abortion, because it *is* an option. And so i did have A, and Nicolas too, but Nicolas was taken from me.
Anyway, that is neither here nor there. While i was dealing with her, the phone rang and i *had* to get it, because the other volunteer was closeted with a 15-year old who had just taken a pg test (negative, but i didn't know it at the time). It was a woman who said she has just been evicted and she was standing on the sidewalk with her 3 kids -- 6,3, and two weeks old. She said she needed help getting to her mother's house, in a city about 45 minutes away. Now, i did not at all know what to do. She was hysterical, evidently. She had a car but no gas, all her stuff was on the sidewalk and in the car, it was dark and cold. She was not a client of ours, i did not know why she had called our number. Still, i thought, maybe the other volunteer will know who she should call, who can help her. So i interrupted that counseling session and sent her to the phone -- because i thought that being the *experienced* volunteer, she should know.
Well, as far as i know, she told that woman that we could not help her and that was it, she hung up the phone. Later she said something like ,'what is she calling us for, at that point you just call a taxi!!'. ?? Then she paused, 'ok, i realize she has no money but STILL'. ??!! ARGH, i can't believe it. This female i was working with apparently personifies that oft-thrown criticism of the pro-life movement -- that they only care about babies until they are born. I was livid, but i said nothing, because i had panicked at the phone call and i had done nothing better.
What should i have done? Hell, if i knew where she was i would have driven out myself and given her the $40 in my wallet. But i had not extracted her address from her while i was on the phone. And i know *very well* how dangerous and stupid it is to do such a thing, we don't live in Maybury or wherever it was that Ward & June Cleaver lived. But in default of that, i could have had her call the homeless shelter -- even if they could not pick her up they would know what advice to give her. But i panicked, and flubbed it. Who knows even how much charge was left on her phone? If she was able to contact someone to help? Maybe they were out there all night. A two-week old out all night, in January in Michigan? God i could not sleep thinking about it. And maybe it was all a lie, that sort of thing happens too, i am sorry to say.
So that's where i was, and who i was thinking about, when i went to the mall today with it's attached Saks and Neiman Marcus to return my gifts. I started in a fairly expensive kid's store that has cute stuff, i have picked up a few things for C there off the sale racks. The sale rack today bore a big sign saying "up to 60% OFF". I pulled out a sweater dress and said, out loud (oops) , 'Oh isn't this cute!' The lady next to me pushing a big stroller said, 'yes, it's darling, they have some really nice things'. Browsing further, i said conversationally, 'Not much at 60% off though!' So she says, 'Well, it's all relative!'
?? No, in fact it is NOT relative, it is math. And it does not take a PhD in math to know that if the original price is $54 and the sale price is $48 then it is NOT 60 percent off. I know her 'it's all relative' meant, 'i think the prices are good and you don't because you are not used to shopping in expensive stores like this one'. (which unfortunately is entirely untrue, i am extremely used to shopping in even more expensive stores than that one -- just ask my credit card company. Why, my credit card has been volubly denied in the fanciest stores on the Champs Elysees and avenue Montaigne...uhh, never mind...long story...) Anyway normally such a thing would not have bothered me at all, but coming on the heels of last night -- i just couldn't stand it. Some rich bitch is snubbing me for not paying $50 for a toddler's dress, after i was unable to help a lady so poor that she can't put GAS in her car to keep a roof over her baby's head. So i left the store, without of course neglecting to first browse the boy's 3T sale section just to make myself feel worse. And let's not forget that as i left the mall, there was George W. Bush on a huge flat-screen tv giving a speech about the ECONOMY and how great it is.
So hence the title of this post, which is no news to anyone -- the rich get richer, and the poor get screwed.
